Dreams can be fascinating things (at least the ones that aren’t boring as all get-out). To die in one’s dreams is pretty dramatic. It might reflect a fear or a desire. If you’re in your teen years, you’re probably about due for some pretty profound and disturbing death dreams. Younger children can and do have these, especially if they’ve had a traumatic experience; but it’s usually around our teen years that we really become more aware of our own mortality, and all that it implies.
The imagery can range from simply matter-of-fact (seeing loved ones receive news that you have died), to surreal (Abraham Lincoln’s famous dream of finding himself in a large room decked in black bunting, with a coffin in the center, and learning that he was the deceased), to downright horrific (actually witnessing one’s violent death, either from one’s own eyes or from a slight distance). Upon awakening, one might feel a sense of dread.
As unsettling as death dreams are, they are quite normal. They might be part of the way we learn to cope with death, which, like it or not, comes to us all.
If the dreams persist, you might wish to see a therapist and see if there are any stressors at work. But usually they go away on their own as we become involved with other things (projects, falling in and out of love, big changes in life/school/jobs, etc.).
And we can all take comfort in the words of the essayist Miguel deMontaigne: “We do not worry about where we were before we were born; why should we worry about where we go after we die? Those who worry about death allow their concerns to deprive them of many a good night’s sleep, and ruin many a good meal, when they should be enjoying them. It is best that we enjoy life while we have it. If one has truly lived well, then when death comes one need not fear it; rather, one should greet it as an old friend, and move on.”
